Tag: 1956

First, the bad news: We are all twice as old as Tom Brady, and collectively we have not won a single Super Bowl.

    Next, some good news: We are all twice as old as Tom Brady.

     I asked classmates how they are coping with the coronavirus. Dick Boyden, John Foster, and Tom Plimpton probably spoke for most of us. They are keeping the home fires burning and biding their time.

     Ray and Jim Gramentine “are holding up well; had our first Moderna vaccination on February 11. To date we cannot have any visitors inside St. John’s (our large Milwaukee retirement institution), but our wonderful daughter brings us sustenance by meeting in the parking lot.”

     Loni and Al Haas report “Our family is well, and our two children and six grandchildren are all within driving distance around Boston. Needless to say, the pandemic has caused pain and strain for our close family. The oldest are freshmen at the University of Miami (Meteorology) and Dartmouth (Big Data) and the next is our only granddaughter who committed to Dartmouth a year ago for lacrosse. A fourth is considering Wesleyan for photography and film in 2022. We will be back on Nantucket for our annual reinvigoration this summer. It is a pity that we may not be able to convene for our 65th. I suppose, in the greater scheme of things, there are more important sounds in our lives than ‘the bells of old South College.’” Al sends “Warm regards to classmates and friends, one and all.”

     Jay Kaplan writes: “Ann and I are both well. I have hardly been out of the house for the past year. I have my trainer come to me via Zoom. Virtually everything is delivered. I have only gone outside for safe walks in my neighborhood and to go to the doctor for my annual physical. My doctor confirmed that I am healthy, and I feel that way.

The Library Committee of the Cosmos Club apparently enjoyed my last book, In Search of Beauty. They have invited me to give a talk to the whole membership on it, which I will be doing in several months. In the meantime, I am now working on another book. My new one will be a novel about an international lawyer. It is a disguised autobiography except the protagonist is young and a bachelor (so I could get a bit of bachelor romance in it). I spend some of my time listening to frequent lectures put on by my club via Zoom on a broad variety of subjects. I also have my periodic board meetings of the Explorers Club and committee meetings of the Cosmos Club and the Philosophic Society of Washington. All in all, I am keeping myself fairly occupied.”

     From Bob Calvin: “I always wear something red for good luck on the Chinese New Year. Unfortunately, there will be no dragon parade in Chicago.

     “Jane and I have had our two COVID vaccinations with no ill effects. Northwestern Hospital is vaccinating 2,000 people a day. It was a seamless event. We feel very lucky and relieved.

     “We have mounds of snow in front of our house and it has been below 20 degrees now for two weeks. I stay sane by going to the gym twice a week to swim and hit tennis balls. We mainly pick the balls up but it is good exercise.

     “Twice a week Jane and I tutor Spanish-speaking immigrants, some undocumented, in conversational English. We do this on Zoom. We are learning a great deal about their experiences and journey.”

     Gary Miller feels “very lucky to be here in North Carolina, out of the snow belt and enjoying a little less stress because Marge and I got our vaccination shots in February with almost no side effects. We made one phone call, got our first shots the next day and were given an appointment for our second shots, two weeks later. Each shot took 30 minutes including paperwork, shots and wait time included, to be sure we didn’t develop an allergic reaction. We were advised to continue distancing, masking, and hand washing until the coast is clear (probably late this year). We may also get to visit the grocery store later than seven in the morning.

     “We’re doing well and hoping to be able to get to our summer place in Maine again this summer for our 27th summer.”

      Our sincere condolences to Leatrice Fung, who wrote: “My husband of 62 years, Lawrence Fung, passed away on September 18, 2020 in our home in Honolulu. May this year of the ox bring your class good health, peace, and happiness.” Larry entered Wesleyan with us, but graduated from Boston University.

     And to Margo Jenkins. George O. Jenkins III succumbed on February 4, 2021. Jay retired from the family businesses in 1995 and settled on Cape Cod, where he pursued his loves of world travel, sailing, model boats, clocks, and entertaining fellow Eclectics. He will be missed.

How to describe 2020? Weird? Scary? Boring? Lonely? Frustrating? Challenging? For Ann and me it’s been all that and more—I’ve rarely left our house except to walk around our block. But we celebrated our 60th anniversary at home with our daughter Judy ’84 and our granddaughter Jeannette. The next weekend we gathered our whole family—all eight of us. The “kids” (all masked) played a board game named Pandemic. It doesn’t get any better than that.

Other stay-at-homes included Walt Ebmeyer: “I’m in ‘The Home’ and not an awful lot goes on here. But I did make contact with my old roomie, Phil Crombie, who seems fine and busy. My kids are fine, 

and their six kids range from 16 to 7. I don’t know who’s going to Wesleyan. A few months ago they visited New York and now talk about nothing but NYU.”

And Tom Plimpton: “The COVID-19 kept us at home. No Minnesota vacation with our cousin; no Civil War trip; no visiting our daughter in Bloomington, Indiana—just staying very close to home. We do have a state park in Indy, and Judy and I go picnicking once or twice a week.”

Dick Bauer is “maintaining sanity, but succumbing to what I’ve dubbed ‘COVID-19 Irritability.’ Trying to make my peace with Zoom, but not always succeeding. Most recent experiment: having residents request songs from the American Songbook that have special meaning for them, then playing them on the piano. Interesting stories  . . . and a little different way to at least attempt to foster connecting in this isolating era.”

Just before COVID-19 shut everything down, Betty and Jim Wagner moved into a nice senior living community that has excellent protocols for protection and has had very few cases. What’s more, the food is excellent, and Jim has “a superb view of the sky for spectacular meteorological and astronomical observations!”

Anne and Bill Moyle “left our retirement community and moved to our nearby lake place in March and stayed for 5½ months. We had anywhere from no one else there to up to eight other family-member escapees. That included a NYC granddaughter, her husband, and their two-year-old son, our first great grandchild. No way we would have gotten to know Will as well as we did except for COVID-19!”

     Jay Kaplan used the COVID-19 recess productively, “reading some of those books I should have read years ago. I started with British writer Ian McEwan, and loved his work so much that I read 20 of his books. My favorite was The Children Act. (A wonderful movie based on this book was made, which you can find on Amazon Prime.) I then turned to J.M. Coetzee and read a good number of his books, including Disgraced, which was my favorite. I then turned to Saul Bellow, who I am enjoying very much. Thus far, Herzog is my favorite.” Jay’s book Secrets and Suspense is selling well; his In Search of Beauty, about his art collections, a little less well. Zoom lessons have enabled Jay to maintain his fitness.

Bob Calvin has been reading, too: Caleb’s Crossing, Spying on the South, and Eric Larson’s book on Churchill, The Splendid and the Vile. He reports no medical problems and staying fit with swimming, tennis, and walks with Jane. They have taken a few car trips to Western Illinois to walk along the Mississippi River and commune with nature. Once a month, they have a delightful four-way telephone conversation with Ronna and Art VonAu. Bob adds, “All the violence in Chicago and the U.S. is very upsetting. It’s interesting to see the Civil Rights movement in which so many in our class were involved is emerging with some changing issues.”

    From Jim Gramentine: “Our first great grandchild, Boden James Finke, was born on July 19th. Weighing in at 9 lbs, 3 oz, he mastered the fine art of eating and figured out the political landscape quickly.”

     Our best story came from my one-time roommate, Whit Rusk: “I went to the Mayo Clinic in Jacksonville, Florida, in late January with a sore, raspy throat and came back home with a plan to remove my entire voice box—diagnosis: cancer! Not really wanting that, we went to Greenwich, Connecticut, where son Rob lives. His wife Alice, who is chief of neurology at the Yale New Haven Hospital System, sent me to Sloan Kettering in New York where she interned. The tiniest doctor there immediately told me, ‘You don’t need surgery; you need treatment.’ So—chemotherapy, radiation, and 36 visits (every weekday) to the New York Proton Center—plus a bout of pneumonia thrown in—and I’m now said to be cancer-free! All this during the COVID-19 debacle! For six months we didn’t leave our son’s house except for treatments. We are home now just waiting for the chemo and radiation effects to wear off—but I am regaining strength, and I can talk! I suppose you could say that 2020 has been pretty good to me.”

Way to go, Whit!

George Chien | gchien@optonline.net

In this strangest of years, it’s not what folks are doing; it’s what we’re not doing.

Ann and I did not drive to Wisconsin to observe the 90th birthday of my big brother Alan ’52. But Zoom conveyed much of the spirit of the celebration. Alma Mater was well represented—by Al and yours truly, of course, but also by his son Chris ’83, our daughter Judy ’84, and our dear friend Hal Buckingham ’52, whom Al first met at Boy Scout camp 75 years ago. Zoom has also kept us in touch with our closed church’s congregation. It’s not perfect, but it’s still heartening. For our 60th wedding anniversary in July, who knows?

Bob Runyon offered this reading list for the self-sequestered: “1. Spillover: Animal Infections and the Next Human Pandemic by David Quammen. (Brilliant, highly readable science reporting; I understood why he was ‘not surprised’ by the 2020 pandemic.) 2. The Plague by Albert Camus. (Compare and contrast.) 3. Drinking with My Father’s Ghost: A Journey Through Irish Pubs by Hugh Reilly.” (Our Chien family tour to the Emerald Isle was nixed.) “4. Call of the Wild by Jack London. 5. Seven Continents by R. Runyon.” (Bob’s antidote for waning wanderlust and his nudge to me to keep putting words on paper. Good stuff.)

Tom Pimpton writes: “I didn’t get to visit the Dry Tortugas National Park in March. We are hoping to go there next year. Now I’m on a waiting list for the medicine to deal with bladder cancer. I really don’t know why it is so scarce. Judy and I will be celebrating our 63rd wedding anniversary on June 29. I was very shy around girls until I met Judy—at Wesleyan. Our oldest daughter, Liz, came on my birthday, June 2, 1958. She will be 62 and is retiring! I can’t believe it. Judy and I are staying isolated. Our governor will make an announcement tomorrow (May 1). I hope he stays conservative, as I don’t want a resurgence of the virus. Peace and joy.”

From Jay Jenkins: “Our best moment to celebrate is Margot’s and my 63 years of marriage! I found her before our choral concert with Mount Holyoke. Margot was from Rhodesia, making logistics expensive but worth it all. Three children: Gail ’84 went to Wes. She had three children with her Wesleyan husband, Jay Farris ’84. Their two daughters graduated from Wes, one with an advanced biochem degree, and the second with a Phi Beta Kappa. Son Dean went to Harvard and was training for Tokyo up until the plague canceled all. Dick Boyden and we have hosted several Eclectic reunions here by the sea in Pocasset, Cape Cod. So fortunate we did as our numbers are dwindling with our last loss, Jack Dunn. My activity other than sailing was heading an architectural preservation museum, a sailing school trustee, and now on the Bourne Historical Commission. I had a rather debilitating stroke last June on my left side, which has caused my restoration of clocks and model shipbuilding to cease. My life by the sea with a good book, my Economist, and my Margot is wonderful!”

Sandy Mendelson adds: “Irene and I continue to live in Bethesda and take advantage of the cultural and familial aspects of Washington, D.C. We’ve both had significant health challenges, but presently all seems to be good. I enjoy some very part-time work in cardiology and bioethics at MedStar Washington Hospital Center, where I’ve worked in various capacities for 52 years. Irene is retired from her career-counseling practice but keeps her mind active with continuing education courses at nearby American University. Two of our sons and their families, fortunately, live nearby; the third son is in Oakland, Calif. Our six grandkids are scattered from New York to The Hague to California. We’re active in our very lively synagogue in D.C., and Irene has led an organization providing housing to the less fortunate. We still love to travel. In the last few years, we’ve gone to Israel, Patagonia, China, Australia, Iceland, and elsewhere. Hopefully, this will continue.”

And from Jim Wagner: “Betty and I have moved into the Greenspring senior living community, in Springfield, Va., just two miles from where we had been living for the past 32 years of our life together. We can hardly believe the amount of stuff we had accumulated! Boxes surrounded us and it still seems like we threw out or gave away five times as much as we kept. Some clothing and non-perishable food we gave through the church we now attend was received very thankfully by a ministry to the homeless and disadvantaged children. That really made us feel good amidst the problems of parting with our stuff!”

Here’s to better days to come.

George Chien | gchien@optonline.net

Late last year our class suffered two irreplaceable losses: Jack Dunn (August 10) and John Chivers (Sept. 3).

John Chivers was a fellow Chi Psi, renowned at the Lodge for his uninhibited, sometimes zany—but never disrespectful—humor. He was serious, though, about his love of the German language and culture, and became a pioneer of sorts, taking a leave from Wesleyan to study in Germany, long before the semester-abroad became commonplace. Around the campus, John was probably best known for his banjo. Ken Spenser remembers: “Chivers was a great banjo man and entertained the Wesleyan community one fall evening an age ago—which I haven’t forgotten. Great guy.” John, who was self-taught, continued to strum, singly and with his band, throughout his life. He was for 40 years a much-loved teacher of German at the Phillips Academy in Massachusetts. Incidentally, I once heard his name on the evening news. An interviewer asked Norman Schwarzkopf (yes, General Norman Schwarzkopf) if he remembered first hearing about the attack on Pearl Harbor. He answered yes: he was 7 years old, living in Lawrenceville, N.J., and up in a tree in Johnny Chivers’ backyard. Of course he was.

Ken adds, “All is well here, although I’m beginning to think that being my roommate at Wes U might not have been such a good luck omen. Of my seven roommates over the four years, five are gone, and I’m not sure about the other two! Egad!”

Like John, Jack Dunn was an educator—though not a teacher—first as president of Dean College and later at Tufts University, where he served for 20 years in various capacities. He was a valued community activist who left a rich legacy wherever he lived.

Ed Thorndike’s wife, Liz, wrote this: “I attended the Celebration of Life for Jack in Exeter. Some of you may recall that Jack was best man at our wedding on Sept. 8, 1955. It was a wonderful service—lots of music and poetry which Jack and Patti had shared. Ed, unfortunately, has dementia and is living in assisted living. But Wesleyan and Eclectic are still recollections. Ed’s dad and Jack’s dad were classmates at Wes and I think both were also Eclectics. So good that you keep in touch.”

Dick Bauer remembers well that “Jack Dunn and I were classmates and playmates back in the first grade; roommates for two years at Wesleyan. I grieve his passing. Really a lovely human being. One of the great benefits of having roomed with Jack (as well as Dave Cox and Ed) is that I was never tempted by the delusion that I was the smartest guy in the world.”

Personally, I never harbored that particular delusion, but my classes with the same Dave Cox, Frank Cancian, and Russ Snyder ’57 confirmed for me that I might not be even the smartest guy in the room. What’s more, I roomed with Bill Shephard ’54, a physics major, who switched from JWC to Chi Psi during his senior year—much to the dismay of his mentor, Prof. Vernet Eaton, who was convinced that the Lodge’s ambiance would ruin Bill’s academic standing. And he was right: that very semester Bill’s average dipped from straight A to A-minus. As for Russ, what I ruefully remember is that he asked really dumb questions at first, but that by the end he had surpassed everyone else in the class. There may be a lesson there, folks.

Bob Bretcher writes: “I enjoyed a holiday visit with each of my three daughters’ families. Thankfully I’m healthy and plan to stay in my home for my remaining years. In place of flying and tennis, I take walks and contemplate a return to pickleball play. Reading and even some memoir writing keeps the brain healthy.”

From Dick Boyden: “Linda Genest, my companion now of 14 years, and I still follow the ‘travel while you can’ mantra, so we will return in March for our 11th visit to the Mahekal Beach Resort in Playa del Carmen, Mexico, for two weeks in late February. Last May we visited the island of Madeira for a week, followed by three days at San Miguel in the Azores.

“Linda remains active on the board of the Fresh Start organization at the Falmouth Service Center. She is also active on the social committee of her condo association nearby. I’m still persuading my Deerfield classmates and Wesleyan fraternity brothers to ‘give again gladly.’ I remain active in leadership roles with the Orenda Wildlife Land Trust and the Bourne Conservation Trust in the Upper Cape area. St. Barnabas Episcopal Church in nearby Falmouth nourishes my soul with parish life activities and organizations that give me a sense of giving and accomplishment.”

That’s all for now.

George Chien | gchien@optonline.net

From my old roommate Whit Rusk: “Pat and I moved to St. Simons Island, Ga., in 2003 after 24 years in Houston, working for banks that no longer exist. We are both still in pretty good health, supported by a few pills. Our two children gave us five grands—four now in college (Lafayette, RPI, Tufts, and Bowdoin) and one 2018 Amherst graduate.” At the time of writing, they were anticipating Hurricane Dorian, which was making its way up the Florida coast.

John Foster: “We Fosters are fortunate, all together in the lovely town of Marblehead, Mass., where Lila and I have lived virtually all of our married life. Our sons and spouses have returned with our four grandchildren. Our lovely daughter, Emily, died in her mid-20s as the result of a water-borne disease in Nepal, but she is with us too, in spirit.

“Our one-plus acre home and grounds, large for this rockbound coast, have given us great joy since the 1970s. For many years, Lila brought her Southern charm and hard work to create naturally landscaped grounds, while I slashed and hacked back the yearly overgrowth. Now, at 85 years young, with energy at a lower tide, I’ve given in and hired a stronger man to help me out for a couple of hours each week.

“Our hovering sons pushed us to retire our much-loved 2004 and 2005 autos (plus our 1967 Olds convertible) to get new-fangled ones with all that safety stuff. We acquiesced with Lila’s car and ultimately sold my Highlander and ’67 Olds convertible. Although my 2005 Toyota Highlander was the best car I’ve ever owned, I’ve never ridden in something as comfortable as the 2001 Lexus LS430 inherited by my two high-spirited, 20-ish granddaughters from their other grandfather. It’s a bit too old-fogey for them, so there may be a deal.”

Loni and Al Haas “have six teenage grandchildren, all of whom are successfully carving their own trails in life. We enjoy driving to the Boston area to visit and stand in once in a while. We passed our 51st wedding anniversary in August, and we still visit Denmark regularly, usually with a grandchild in tow to expose them to a wonderful piece of their heritage. As for health, seven stents in my heart, a bout with a rare form of cancer (Merkel cell carcinoma) and 50 extra pounds have not interfered with my life or relationships. I don’t swing a club very well anymore, and my love of body surfing on Nantucket has diminished as I become less steady on my feet in raging surf.”

Al still heads Educational Futures, whose mission is to find college destinations for young people from around the world. Now, he writes, “I am working with my two oldest grandchildren on college planning, which is a cozy capstone for my career.”

Jay Kaplan, having published two well-received books, Secrets and Suspense and In Search of Beauty, is now “working on creating a Museum of Jewish Civilization. We have found a site at L’Enfant Plaza in downtown D.C. next door to the new and quite spectacular Spy Museum. Our museum is being designed by the world renowned architect Daniel Libeskind, whose works include the popular Jewish Museum in Berlin and Ground Zero in New York.”

Walter Ebmeyer will “get my first walker this week in preparation for the World Climate Change Week protests here in Washington on Sept. 20-27. It will provide me with a place to sit down from time to time (Parkinson’s). Good e-mails from my old indefatigable roomie, Phil Crombie.”

Bob Calvin writes: “My wife, Jane, an art photographer, is having an exhibit at the University of Missouri art museum in St. Louis. Her video project on Chicago cottages will be featured.”

Jim Gramentine’s “granddaughter, Polly Durant, who still calls [him] DanDan, is scheduled to marry one Michael Kellner next October. Our grandson, Nathanial, a graduate of St. Andrew’s School, Florida, has jumped his way into the Ivy League (Columbia). It takes more than good scores and grades these days, and in his case high jumping 6’10” to win the Florida Relays last April may have been decisive.”

Ann and I were on the move all summer: Chile with our family (the eclipse, of course); Tanglewood with granddaughter Jeannette (Verdi’s Requiem); the Adirondacks (Ann’s high school reunion); Burlington (Jeannette’s freshman digs at the University of Vermont); Cobleskill—look it up—(brunch with high school chums, meeting in person a long-lost cousin found through Ancestry.com, plus our 59th anniversary); and the Catskills (the annual Chien family gathering—where taking the ritual photo was enlivened when a grandnephew presented The Ring to his unsuspecting fiancée-to-be; she said “Yes!”)

Back home we are traveling vicariously with Sheila and Bob Runyon via his newly published Seven Continents Before Incontinence: A Memoir of Travel & Togetherness. Fascinating stuff. Try it. (It’s available from Amazon.) Way to go, Bob!

George Chien | gchien@optonline.net

Barry Passett died on April 17. Barry was a local boy (Hartford) who became a decision-maker in the field of health care in the big city (Washington, D.C.) Barry was an extraordinary human being: Soft-spoken, genial, compassionate, smart, and wise. When he wrote that he was growing cranky in his dotage, I dismissed the notion as pure rhetorical fiction. Rest in peace, Barry. We’ll miss you as we miss only a precious few.

Jay Kaplan invites you to read the reviews of his book Secrets and Suspense at Amazon. Better yet, read the book and write your own reviews. His second book In Search of Beauty, now finished, will be published by New Academia Press.

Betty and Jim Wagner celebrated their 50th anniversary in August! Praise the Lord!

Judy and Tom Plimpton celebrated their 62nd in June. Also in June, Tom shared a birthday (85) with his daughter Liz (61). Tom’s first therapy protocol for bladder cancer went well; his doctor says the cure rate is at least 70 percent. Quoting Tom, “Peace and joy.”

Marge and Gary Miller celebrate their 63rd in September. Their summer dwelling on Sheepscot Pond in northern Maine is a gathering spot for friends and family. Granddaughters: One received three promotions in a year from SEI in Pennsylvania; the other is a costume designer at Walnut Street Theater in Philadelphia. Grandsons: One is a brewmaster, concocting specialty beers for the Itasca Brewery near Chicago; another (age 14) in on track for Eagle Scout.

Susan and Mort Paterson toured northern India last summer. “Taj Mahal at 7 a.m. is as magnificent as they say. Cremation fires at night along the Ganges, priests chanting Sanskrit, are mind-blowing. Lots of gods to worship. Learned that if I can get similarly cremated on the banks of the Ganges, I can escape forever the burdens of reincarnation. I think I’d prefer the banks of the Wabash—‘back home again in Indiana’—where I’m from.

“Still treading the boards in and around Philadelphia—Much Ado About Nothing, Winter’s Tale, and Purlie Victorious (by Ossie Davis). One theater performed my play, The Crimes of Diana Eastlake (a newly-poor widow must sell the family Matisse to raise the ransom for her daughter, kidnapped by terrorists in Syria, then learns it’s a fake). I am told all this is ‘healthy’ and may hold me in no worse than Stage 1 dementia (‘very mild cognitive decline’). My oldest son and his daughter from San Francisco visited us and eastern colleges. Wesleyan, I hope.”

Tamara and Dave Cox moved from Washington State to Silver Spring, Md. “We’re in day-visit range of one son and closer than before to the other two. Travel resumes: Tamara spent six weeks cruising about Europe, visiting three sets of British relatives. In October, we’ll do overlapping tours to Germany, mostly filling in gaps in the former DDR. Then, in February, we’ll cruise around Cuba with a dip into the Bahamas on the way back. We’re stubbornly plodding along as long as possible. So far, so good.”

Ginny and Dick Bauer “cheered grandson number two at his graduation from UNH and celebrated our 60th wedding anniversary.”

Dick continues: “As for me, more of me hurts, less of me works, and semantic memory goes AWOL on me now and then. I survived aneurysm surgery, do an informal piano concert once a month, take part in a discussion group and a Global Warming Action Group, and have abundant occasions to care for souls. Don’t travel much, but read quite a bit, and relish the easy access to bright and interesting people who are gracious enough to welcome me into their lives.”

Bette and Al Grosman are now residents of Linden Ponds, joining the Bauers and the Van Au family in a cluster of Wes ’56ers there.

Writes Art Van Au: “We are delighted that our fourth grandchild, Hannah, will be entering Connecticut College, the alma mater of my wife Rosalind, my sister Elizabeth, and our son Peter. Connecticut College’s re-invention of liberal arts education, called ‘Connections,’ integrates one’s interests into a meaningful educational ‘pathway’ through college and into a fulfilling career and life. We are eager to be present for the results.”

Bob Bretscher is trying to rehab his shoulder for tennis, finishing a memoir, and being awed by his five grands, one of whom has his degree from Ole Miss and another will graduate next year from UNC Chapel Hill.

Jim Jekel writes: “Time is limiting us more, but time also brings a bigger family. Jan and I now have three great-grandchildren, and we have received reports that three more are underway. As their number is increasing, and our memories are decreasing, a time may soon come when we will no longer be able to remember all their names!”

Finally, Ann and I and our nuclear family went to Chile this summer—for the eclipse, of course. Granddaughter Jeannette becomes a University of Vermont Catamount this fall.

George Chien | gchien@optonline.net