Author: classnotes

Categories Class Notes, Class Notes | 1950sPosted on

CLASS OF 1956 | 2022 | FALL ISSUE

It’s been slim pickings this time around for our class notes.

But first, I’m sad to report that Al Grosman died on May 22 in Hingham, Massachusetts, where he and his wife of 55 years, Bette, had retired. He spent most of his life in New Jersey, where he practiced law with his family law firm and dabbled in local politics. He wrote a much-used textbook, New Jersey Family Law, and was involved in the Baby M surrogacy case. Baby M, incidentally, attended and graduated from—mercifully with little fanfare—the school district in which my Ann was a school nurse, but they were never in the same building together. Al, a self-described “world traveler and scholar of world history,” spoke Spanish, Portuguese, and French, and studied German, Romanian, Catalan, and Ladino. He loved folk music of all kinds and enjoyed playing the piano for family sing-alongs. He is survived by Bette, two daughters, Carol and Ellen, their spouses, and two granddaughters. Al was a loyal Wes grad (Phi Beta Kappa!) and a regular attender of our ’56 reunions. He will be missed.

Art von Au writes: “I recently read Vinod Busjeet’s (’73) novel Silent Winds, Dry Seas, which was featured in the Wesleyan Alumni Magazine (Winter 2021–2022). What an extraordinary gift! Set in Mauritius in the 1960s and 70s, it is a coming-of-age story. Wesleyan readers will recognize clues as his years at ‘Yale’ are a stand-in for Wesleyan. His novel has won widespread praise from some foremost American writers, and I recommend this remarkable novel to all Wesleyan readers. Perhaps the reading/discussion group that I have led for almost 50 years (now meeting on Zoom) will read it in the future.

“In family news, we have welcomed two great-grandsons this past year. Our three oldest grandchildren are all launched into jobs and family life, while the three youngest will all be in college this coming year. One granddaughter will be a junior at the University of Vermont and [another] a senior at Connecticut College. Our youngest grandson will be a freshman at Endicott College.

“We have enjoyed reading your family news and travels and hope that all is well with you.”

From Jim Gramentine: “Back in early June, I attended my 70th high school reunion at Western Reserve Academy. Regrettably, only one other ’52er was there, he a fine fellow, though an Amherst Mammoth. (Lord Jeff was done in by political correctness.) Depression born, only 38 graduated with us, but three others matriculated with me at Wesleyan: Bob Loos, Pete Schellenbach ’59, and Bill Mathews.”

And Bob Bretscher: “Thanks for keeping the Class of ’56 in touch. Unfortunately, I’m not communicating with anyone in our class at the moment. I’ll try to improve on this unintended situation soon. I’m still healthy, and happy to have just finished my self-published autobiography. My next task is to look into moving into a nearby retirement facility called ‘Presbyterian Village Athens’ sometime in the next 12 months. My best to you and other Wesmen.”

Last, but not least, Dick Bauer: “A celebration of life for Alan Grosman was held here at Linden Ponds on June 8th. Al not only distinguished himself in the field of family law, but in family life as well.

“No really great newsworthy stories from us. Ginny and I are faring pretty well. One of my quirky projects has been playing monthly piano concerts exploring various corners of the American Songbook.  Keeps me distracted from the world’s misery for a while.

“Good to learn about your family travels . . . even more to sense the warmth and strength of your family ties, and your stamina to relish them.

“Warm regards to my fellow Wes ’56ers.”

I have some space, so here’s what Art and Dick referenced.

Our whole family—one daughter, two sons, one daughter-in-law, one granddaughter, and a girlfriend—took us on a whirlwind tour of New York State: Cobleskill (my hometown); Cooperstown; Letchworth State Park (“The Grand Canyon of the East”), where we rented a house near Inspiration Point; Frank Lloyd Wright’s Martin House in Buffalo; and Niagara Falls (U.S. and Canadian sides). Along the way we visited with cousins, went to the Baseball Hall of Fame, rode the Maid of the Mist, and drove over the Peace Bridge from Buffalo to Fort Erie, Canada—my father’s major project between graduating from RPI and going back to China. In Cooperstown’s Doubleday Café, son David got down on one knee to reprise his 1999 proposal there to Cheryl, which she again accepted—to a hearty round of applause from one and all. All of this was to compensate us for our COVID-canceled Ireland tour of 2020. The younger set subsequently used our once frozen fares to tour Scandinavia. They just came home—all but one with COVID. We love them still.

Categories Obituaries, Obituaries | 1950-1959Posted on

James “Jim” Killough III ’57, P’85, ’88

James “Jim” Killough III ’57, P’85, ’88 passed away on December 2, 2021. Evan M. Drutman ’86 provided this memory.

James Killough, III

1935-2021

            It stands as a monument to his dedication, perseverance, and philanthropy.  The landmarked structure at 242 High Street, Middletown, Connecticut, built in 1893 on the campus of Wesleyan University and home to the Xi (pronounced “z’EYE”) Chapter of the Psi Upsilon Fraternity, has housed student members for over 125 years.  That grand dame of the campus, centrally located across from the office of the University president, has served daily meals, hosted meetings, seminars, musical and theatrical performances, educational events, and social gatherings for the Wesleyan campus at-large.  And it did so in recent years due to the indefatigable efforts of its de facto chairman, Jim Killough, who died on December 2, 2021, in the Renaissance Care Center in Gainesville, TX, a hospice facility outside of Dallas/Ft. Worth.

That a fraternity would even exist today on the politically “progressive” campus of Wesleyan University is no mean feat.  Much of the credit for its longevity and enduring popularity over the previous 30 years can be attributed to Jim Killough.  He provided the undergraduate members with advice and guidance, sometimes on a daily basis; he helped navigate the organization through the occasional adolescent misconduct of a member; he provided the diplomacy needed for the indulgence of a recalcitrant school Administration; and he had the intuition to admit women members, and to persuade a resistant membership, long before the University mandated co-education in 2014.

Most of all, he had the vision to sustain a traditionalist organization with values largely resembling his own.   Those values were articulated in four broad maxims expressing indisputable virtues which would define the organization and its mission:

  • Service before Self
  • Pursuit of Wisdom
  • Personal Responsibility
  • Virtuous Character 

Those phrases, which Jim labeled collectively as “The Credo”, would become his guiding principles for the fraternity.  In his typical modesty, Jim credited The Credo to someone else: the fraternity’s beloved former faculty advisor and university provost William Kerr; however, few ever doubted its true origin.

James Killough III was born in Albany, NY, on November 18, 1935, to James Killough, Jr. and the former Mary Ann Hunting.  Jim spent his childhood summers in the Thousand Islands, scooping ice cream at the legendary Guzzle on the banks of the St. Lawrence River, a venue to which he would return throughout his life. Like his uncle, he attended Wesleyan, graduating in 1957, and then received an MBA from Harvard Business School in 1959.

He briefly served in the U.S. Army, at Fort Dix, NJ, in Army intelligence, from May to November of 1959.

His early career was spent in advertising:  first, with Proctor and Gamble; then with Dupuy-Compton (now Saatchi & Saatchi) in Italy, resulting in the occasional Italian language expression which would inflect his communications.  While in Italy, he became involved in politics, supporting Republican candidates in the United States, including the presidential campaign of Ronald Reagan, for which he worked upon his return to this country.

He had a second career later in life, improbably as an internet company executive, bringing his business acumen to RunTime Technologies, a New York City-based website creator and internet provider, which was suffering from the .com implosion.

Jim’s first marriage, to the former Sandra Davis, ended in divorce.  It produced three children:  James Killough IV, of Los Angeles, and Sarah K. Dhar, of New Canaan, CT, both of whom similarly attended Wesleyan, and John Hunting (“Hunt”) Killough, of Denver, CO.

He married his second wife, the late Donna Simpkins, in 1984, describing her as the “love of his life”, and moving with her from New York to the Dallas/Ft. Worth area to be closer to her children.  She predeceased him in 2018, following which Jim spoke for the rest of his life of marking time until he could rejoin her in Heaven.  Jim is survived by his three children, his son-in-law, Vishal Dhar, his daughter-in-law, Angela Killough, four grandchildren, two stepchildren, and a step granddaughter.

Until the end of his life, Jim remained committed to the welfare of “The Xi”, as the fraternity chapter is known by its members, reviewing correspondence, and offering the occasional recommendation.  As the fraternity continues its mission and its search for Jim’s successor—someone with his vision and commitment, someone putting Service before Self, someone betraying his Virtuous Character—it will have one advantage Jim never had:

It will have his example. 

 

Evan M. Drutman 

Wesleyan University, B.A. 1986 

Member, Xi Chapter of Psi Upsilon